Seen Not Heard
Those are three words that, in my experience, can do more harm than many of the tools we unknowingly carry in our arsenal to wound one another — especially children.
Our voice is one of the primary ways our character, our inner state, our joy, and our connection are expressed.
Yes, body language communicates… but voice carries vibration. Voice carries emotion. Voice carries presence.
Many of us — myself included — grew up hearing the phrase “Be seen, not heard.”
I remember one moment in particular. I was singing an Elton John song. Someone asked, “Hey, who sings that?”
I proudly answered, “Elton John!”
And they replied,
“Well… you should probably let him do it.”
That one stung.
But something inside me refused to disappear. Singing became a source of joy unlike anything else in my life. If I had to sing in the car… the shower… or the bathroom… so be it. And if I could share it with others? Even better.
The Yoga of the Voice
Yoga teaches us how to live and relate to the world through principles called the Yamas and Niyamas. The very first Yama is Ahimsa — Do No Harm.
Think about how often the voice can create harm… not just toward others… but toward ourselves.
Even when words are not spoken aloud, our inner voice carries enormous weight. And sometimes, we do speak those limiting, negative beliefs out loud. That, too, is harm.
My beloved teacher Arun reminds me often:
“Almost everything can be resolved through Ahimsa.”
When we speak with kindness, gentleness, and compassion, we elevate ourselves and those around us. When our internal dialogue is harsh or critical, that energy inevitably leaks into how we communicate with others.
So… what do we do?
Small Shifts… Big Healing
We begin with compassion.
When we notice judging, limiting, or negative thoughts — directed inward or outward — we simply notice. And then we gently cultivate the opposite.
Sometimes my inner voice says,
“Danny… you’re lazy… you’re worthless…”
(Sad but true — and I suspect I’m not alone.)
Instead, I practice shifting toward:
“Look at what you accomplished today.”
“Look at the value you bring into the world.”
These subtle shifts — just like we’ve been exploring all year — create profound changes in how we relate to ourselves… and therefore… how we relate to others.
The Courage of Hearing Others
We can take this practice one step further.
When someone close to us speaks with self-limiting or harmful language — toward themselves or toward us — we pause. We breathe. And we try to respond with compassion, recognizing that what we are witnessing is often a reflection of their relationship with themselves in that moment.
That takes courage.
It takes patience.
It takes resilience.
And resilience is one of the greatest gifts we can cultivate through our voice.
(Side Note - I recently heard a quote for JVN of Queer Eye Fame, he says it this way. “When I hear someone say something limiting about themself I say ‘CROP FAILURE!’ This is because our words are our seeds.”)
Friday Night… The Voice Came Alive
This past Friday, something beautiful happened at our Community Fun Night.
We didn’t just hear voices… we witnessed courage.
We heard laughter.
We heard playful attempts at high notes.
We heard poems spoken with dramatic flair.
We heard songs sung imperfectly and perfectly at the same time.
And maybe my favorite part…
When someone finished sharing, the room erupted into a unified ROAR of approval.
It wasn’t about performance.
It was about participation.
It was about celebration.
Even those who didn’t step up to the mic used their voices — singing along, cheering, encouraging, adding energy to the room. The collective voice became the healing instrument.
That is community.
That is medicine.
That is Emotional Driver energy in motion.
The Sacred and Playful Power of Sound
Using our voice is one of the most vulnerable things we can do.
That is why I am so excited to continue offering opportunities at the studio to explore voice through:
• Karaoke
• Poetry
• Group singing
• Sacred chanting and mantra
When we use our voice in a safe, loving, playful, and compassionate environment — deep healing happens.
We begin shifting from judging ourselves…
to celebrating ourselves.
From criticizing others…
to cheering them on for simply trying.
Whether it is hitting a note… cracking on a note… shaking our hips while singing… or learning sacred sounds that challenge how we use our voice — this is some of the most joyful work I know.
Your Voice Matters
I would genuinely love to hear from you.
What does your inner voice say about your voice?
Have there been moments when someone else's words shaped how you express yourself?
Where do you feel safe using your voice… and where do you hold back?
Everyone has a voice.
Everyone deserves to be heard.
Let’s keep lifting each other up.
ROAR with love,
Danny
The Emotional Driver
“Emotion Is the Note. You Are the Song.”
